Yesterday, I tried on a big red swimsuit at a department store. What was I thinking? First of all, the dressing rooms were full (I should have heeded this warning and refrained from exposing myself to the monster mirrors inside). Nothing shakes one's confidence like swim suit truth. Seriously, I wanted to click my heels together three times and BE home. When I walked into our house I felt cozy relief and accepting love, that safety that comes when you are fully clothed. When you go shopping for clothing, do you feel suddenly attached to your own familiar garments? I do. They fit. I try on a few things and then take comfort in the clothes I had on, deciding that I like them more than I did a few moments ago. They give hope. I believe in school uniforms because they are a good equalizer and they tend to prevent a lot of "personal appearance angst" with girls especially. When I was at a Christian women's conference a few weeks ago, I noticed that everyone around my age had on capri pants, similar comfortable shoes and nondescript knit shirts or blouses. That's a uniform, isn't it? I've always thought nuns looked very pretty in their look alike outfits.
Kelli invited me to join her for a manicure and pedicure today and I looked around at the feet near me. Old feet, young feet. All fairly unsightly because let's face it, cute feet are rare. But all this to say: I worry about dumb things. I need to get out more.
My eyelid is healing up nicely, thank you! Fitting all my medical appointments in a two week period wasn't all that smart. I think I'm shyer than I thought I was. All the waiting room, blood drawing, breast screening (yikes!) and "filling out forms" business IS NOT FUN and made me nervous, very nervous. I know. Weird. One more appointment to go. The dermatologist. I like him. He is so speedy at removing unnecessary (ahem) things and for some reason I am not one bit shy about letting him check out the battle scars of aging all over my freckled skin. And there you have it. I have nothing more exciting to share than my boring old personal business. Thanks for reading.
25 comments:
Since I had not read your previous post I just went back and did so.
Sorry to hear about your eye surgery. Glad to hear it is healing well.
Your upcoming trip sounds so nice.
Now, I can so relate to this post today. Trying on bathing suits is not fun! I'd much rather stay in the comforts of my old clothes and the safety of my home.
I can also relate to the medical appts. we face at this age. I've been putting off the dreaded colonoscopy for 4 years. I did fill out the paperwork today... now if I can work up the courage to mail it. Ha ha.
Oh you poor dear, I am sure that anything you wear you are adorable. I have a very cute suit that is red too. I hadn't tried it on this year, and since I have been feeling as big as a house, every time my husband would say, " Do you want to go swimming?" I would snarl like a mad dog and say NO!!" I decided that was enough and I was miserable because I was so hot. I hid in the bathroom and put it on, it was too big. :) Figure that out, because I still feel as big as a house. So now I swim every day. I don't snarl either. :)
I wish you could come over to my house, we could talk of books and our Raggedy Ann's, we could sit and just have fun. We could watch chicks. I would show you how to make jam and let you take it all home.
I hope you rest a bit. I think you must just be given out after being such a good Grandmother. :)
At least now you've got all those horrid doctors' appointments behind you. I need to do the same thing. Both my husband and I need to go to the dermatologist. I know he has bad things on his ears from too much sun over the years. I had a wisdom tooth pulled yesterday. It had become abscessed. I was glad to get it out. It's been causing me trouble for two or so years.
I hope the rest of your summer is filled with fun, laughter, and good books.
Oh I can so relate on the bathing suit..I posted on it last year, and I hate, totally hate dressing rooms...too much of a reality check for me. I gave in this year and bought a bathing suit...first time in about 15 years...still don't like them on me.
Blessings on all your appointments...I do love those pictures of bathers
I love the bathing ladies! Now those are REAL women, lol! I have a black swimsuit with white polka dots and a little panel of fabric that hides my belly. Haven't used it for years, but I enjoyed it last time I had the nerve to swim!
A couple of years ago I had a whole battery of tests done because I hadn't had insurance for many years. My doctor seemed to think I was quite a hypochondriac, but I had seven years worth of stuff that I had been wondering about! My first colonoscopy (my dad had colon cancer) and my first mammogram went pretty well. It's good to have it behind you!
Hope the rest of your summer is fun and you get a chance to swim!
Oh swimsuits! By now I'm used to them but it took a little courage at first to get used to them. I've been having doctor's appointments and dentist too, I dislike going to the doctor a lot!! I cannot even tell you how much I dislike it, especially getting the women's exam, I have another appointment on Monday and then I'll be done. Hope you have a great week Pom Pom!
Oh, can I ever understand. Sigh. I have recently found a strange mole and probably need to go in. I want to change doctors, though, and I am in a bit of denial. My dog needs to go, too, and get his nails clipped. Even going to the vet is not something I want to do. And it all rates right up there with trying on swim suits. Did you find one you liked? I"m sure you look beautiful. Just like those women in the painting. Hugs.
Pss.... did you take comment verification off of your blog? Thank you thank you thank you.
Oh PoPom - you need mail order! I know the feeling crammed into changing rooms with beautiful young things is very demoralising! there are some lovely swim dress type things on the internet that look really pretty and ladylike and have a little short skirty bit, I get my swim skirts and tankini tops from Boden.co.uk maybe you have similar? I rarely try on in shops these days. I like uniform, infact we don't have one at work so I sort of made my own - white blouse, navy trousers and pretty scarves or a wrap depending on climate. Hope you have fabulous time on your holiday and don't give up entirely on something swimmy that feels right.
The only way I will try on swimsuits is at home!
Hope all continues to improve.
I've been catching up on your last couple of blog posts. I LOVE the way you describe things. You are wonderful, PP! Swimsuits....shouldn't they be a banned substance? Bright lycra that doesn't cover wobbly thighs...make 'em illegal!!
x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x
Oh, changing room angst - so true! Have you read The Diary of a Provincial Lady and its sequels, by EM Delafield? She wrote great descriptions of such traumas, back in the 1930s... And I love what you wrote about loving your own clothes all the more once you sink gratefully back into them.
Well done you for going through all those appointments. I tend to pile them up into a few weeks, too - it may be awful at the time but once they're done, they're done! Have a restoring, relaxing time now, Pom Pom.
Dear Pom Pom, this post did make me laugh because I could identify with it so much. We feel so vulnerable when there is any chance of our bodies being exposed, don't we. I had a most demoralising appointment at the hospital this week with the rheumatology doctor. I was there because I have had various aches and pains and after blood tests my doctor decided to refer me to the hospital. Well after describing all my symptoms to the (at least!) lady doctor and having to strip down to my underwear to be poked and prodded, I was hoping for a little bit of sympathy along with her diagnosis. Not likely. I was told that there was nothing wrong with me that diet, exercise, and improved posture couldn't cure, except a bit of osteo-arthritis in my fingers, and age. She was perfectly nice and kind about it, but I felt so ashamed that I had let myself go to such an extent! I am now back at the gym and swimming like a good 'un, and walking the dog at manic speed. My pink swim-suit doesn't look too flattering on me, but i'm hoping for improvement.
Oh Pom Pom,I'm so glad the toadstools are back! lol.
I agree with everything you say,about the clothes ,fitting rooms,yuk! like you said My own clothes fit,what more could I want,who needs reality in a fitting room! The only fitting rooms I find myself in these days are with My nearly 14 year old and her 'perfect' bod,boo hoo :) Glad all of your appointments are nearly out of the way,I HATE waiting rooms too!
I hope you have a wonderful weekend,the kids break up here today,woohoo :) xxxxxxlots of love juliex
After reading your post and all the comments, all I have to say is "at least you are still buying swimsuits"..(I gave them up about ten years ago) So you still have it, girl!
Love the swimming girls and the happiness shown in the red girl!
Nancy
You could never be boring, Pom! It sounds like you're trying to get all the icky stuff out of the way, so you can truly enjoy your vacation with family - and that's smart. Your description of the trying-on mentality is exactly how I feel. I think, if i were a size 8, I'd enjoy shopping. As it is, I avoid it. Large women have to spend a small fortune to find cute, well-cut clothing. Ugh!
Hello, dear friend, and yes, I can totally identify with everything you said!! I, too, like the idea of school uniforms. I think it cuts down so much on being a part of the "in" group because of what you wear. Uniforms are a great equalizer. I hope you have a perfectly lovely weekend! Vicki
glad the eyelid is healing! great!
i don't like clothes shopping. the lights in those dressing rooms are incredibly harsh! :)
Thank God your surgery went well. As to clothes shopping...it's difficult to find things that are comfortable, affordable and don't make a woman look like a cheap tart. Shoes especially are difficult. Here I sit with my feet ensconced in an old pair of Merrill's that feel wonderful but look a tad shabby. I'll wear them until they fall off my feet!
Hullo darling pompom! Hope your eye is much much better. Your page always makes me smile...and I have that very toadstool lamp! In my daughter's room.
Hello, gorgeous, gorgeous you. I do so hope that your eye and all else is healing well and that you will be feeling much better, happier, healthier, bouncier, generally rosier, pinker, oranger than ever before. I cannot wait to see Brave. The boys have been mercilessly signed up for many busy happy things, and I am now wondering when they can take me to Brave. I don't think I can wait longer than a week! I already feel the covetous desire to be a cartoon character creeping on- I like the look of this girl. Much as I felt after Despicable Me- Margot in glasses and tweed jacket, or Nanny Big Bang McPhee- tea dresses, tank tops and aprons. I am reading Children of the New Forest- have you read it too? If not, I think you'd love it. Home making and small holding with children in the deep forest, with the odd exciting skirmish with Cromwell. YOu don't have to be Irish to appreciate the thrill that could have been! I may just have to watch some Nanny Bang before bed. Or maybe another chapter or three of Forest....
You so make me laugh about your changing room saga but I know exactly what you mean,and that is why mail all is so good :) Sorry to hear about your eye surgery hope you are feeling much better now love LBF x
I REALLY dislike swimsuits and I haven't worn mine since last summer to the stock pond. This year's swimming won't happen here...to ucky out there. I don't like going to get pedicures. I DO like soaking my own feet in my own tub of epsom salts and taking care of my own toes (thank you very much). I guess I'm just too independent in that way.
I would like to have cute clothes, but they are hard to find for me and I'm not the best shopper. Ah well. Your saga is my saga. Does that make you feel better?
I love the way you think, you always make me laugh! I don't know how many years it has been since I've tried on a bathing suit...way too many to count! :) Clothes shopping is not something I enjoy doing, though it has to be done sometimes. I'm glad that your eye is doing well. I've been praying for you. Enjoy the rest of your week!!
love the swim gals (:)
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