and I try to be something else . . .
When REALLY, I'm a sheep among many sheep.
We struggle with the ghosts of what we want to be. If we were just an "also ran" in high school, don't we try and try to become one of the stand out "kids" in the crowd? If we were a decent athlete, but still unsatisfied, do we try to somehow/someway get the kind of accolades that we STILL want so badly? If we were a stocky kid (this is me!) don't we want to somehow/somehow transform into a skinny person? I do. It's so dumb. Isn't our "wannabe" our thorn in the flesh? Think of our children or our friends or our siblings, for that matter . . . if we knew they wanted to be something they CAN NEVER BE, it makes sense to say to them, "I LOVE YOU the way you are and I know that what you are striving for is highly unlikely, so please rest and give up that futile quest." Or we might just try to love them harder, so they'd know that they ARE ENOUGH. We just don't feel like we are ENOUGH so much of the time. But, that lamb huddled up with the LION, that looks like ENOUGH to me. Lord, I need you. I need you REAL bad.